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  • Bats were chirping quiet loudly in the air that midnight. The silence that moment had had the semblance like none before. Not even one sound could be recorded I could remember very well; everything was as dead as the cold hands of death himself. Except for the chirping of the those bad birds whose verses I averse so very well. And the continuous shout help help help that coupled the whir of the birds. It was the tone of Suwa, Fijy's mother, who was as old as the worst tattered rag one could ever picture.
    Fijy had all ready woken and the shout which continued was not a great shock to him, in spite it was in the midnight, so he sped down like a squirrel treated for maniacal plight to the area the shout was coming from to know what was going on.
    ''Fijy, Fijy, Fijy. It was..., It was... Ah... Ah... Ah...'' Suwa said crying, gasping and quivering right in her room.
    She was in the rest room where people rest of cause. The bedsheet, for covering the bed of cause, had fallen and the bed had shifted from its face to the back part. The stool, which receives food to be taken of cause, and all that that stood before the midnight had turned opposite. Even the pictures that were hung in the room had fallen again. The good food she was served she would not eat had developed maggots overnight again. Still screaming right on top of her loud voice, she was crying alongside with tear glands flocking up the floor of the room like the great ocean we were told in the tales. She was seated at the tip of the bed and it was the coming in of Fijy into the scene that quieted her.
    Fijy entered and was aggravated and saddened to the core in the heart. His countenance dropped having seen what the well set room had turned to again, weariness was what took him up next with its painful tusks, for that night was not her first night to scream right in the mid of the night since her arrival from the village.
    ''Mama, is it your usual dream again or something else this time?'' Fijy asked mellowly putting on the light from the switch at the entrance into the room. Suwa would not talk again, in the stead of telling her son what went wrong she went into her sleeping position with her back facing the face of the bed. Fijy left the room confused again for her mother would not tell him what she saw in her dreams that would always make her scream almost midnightly. He was so very tired of neighbours asking him questions he has no answers to when the day breaks, about the causes of the screaming from his house. All he would always do was to lie that it was his mother who has mental problem. He loves Suwa a lot no doubt about that, even the intervention of his wife to send her back to the village would not make him do that.
    In the following morny, the nightguards that watch over their streets came to pay him a visit.
    ''Dr. Fijy, we have been contemplating whether to come over here to come and ask you why someone would always make a disturbing noise in your building for long. So yesterday we agreed to'' their leader said. One of them added, '' sir, am one of the nightguards that watch over your affairs besides God when you have gone to the bed to sleep, the kind of noise that person makes would always make wake us up thinking may be thieves are on raid again. We have come really to urge you to tell that person to stop it, it is not helping, it disturbs and diverts attention, you are well read, am sure you would understand us''.
    After three days, the same thing repeated itself at the same time it did the last time. The next Saturday even was the day and time scheduled for the estate meeting that happens twice in two months, the issue was what was discussed on through out the meeting. Suwa lied that it was his mother who was mentally ill that would always make the disturbing noise. The street elders then urged him to take her to the appropriate hospital for appropriate care, they made him aware they live in estate filled with persons of affluence, who have businesses they think about all day and the night's only when they rest but now his mother is denying them that. He promised he would do something soon and the meeting came to a close.
    Suwa bought a local daily paper, a week after the meeting held, it had it that some pinchers were caught around Visuwo Street, Bopruz Avenue, Degi Area Ilumodun State and have been jailed for the assassination of Mr Plater, a white man, who  had come to invest in the country. Their pictures were at the front page of the paper, the max. were enough even for blind persons to see and identify.
    Out of disgust, Fijy soliloquised ''where exactly are we going to in this country?'' ''What's happened again my son?'' Suwa asked. Fijy picked up the paper n' showed his mother, ''see, these young men killed this whiteman who've come to come and help this country up''. ''Ah Ah Ah, my son this is a good news, this is the reason I make noise usually in the midnight''. ''What?'' Fijy asked confusedly.
    Jodekss Gloatkenf.
    Skirts.

    Bogo - Female character
    Mopo - Female character
    Zozo -  Male character
    Toto  -   Male character.

    Zozo:
    welcome friend, it has been long since we have sat together like this. Don't you think! How is school?

    Toto:
    Just there jare, we are pushing it little by little. Well, before we know it we are done. And when was the last time and you and our friend talk?

    Zozo:
    He did not call and neither did I. You know, as it is with him so it is with you. People don't call much these days you know, Facebook, whatsapp and all that are there. Only megabyte and battery suffer the consequence. Uhm! I am taking that exam again you know, my keen passion for education is still there. I am choosing another ivory tower jare my friend. In fact enh, home bores now, really friend, am tired!

    Toto:
    You just don't give up brother, it is gonna be fine you know. Even if you have lost that passion we would feed you till death... ;)

    Zozo:
    You are crazy. :)
    So, gist me about your babes on campus ehn!

    Toto:
    Ahem! I do not have their time o. It is my book and I only. My book is my big babe! :*

    Zozo:
    Your eye brows blink faster when you are lying you know;). Well, Serve me with something guy.

    Toto:
    Okay, I hope you do not mind a warm drink! Yes of cause you don't mind. Soooo, gist me about her. Is she around? I mean Bogo!

    Zozo:
    Ah, that one, yeah, she came around but I learnt she had returned. Well, you know, people like her be one of the reasons my passion for education should remain. We are not really into relationship like that anymore. She is now wiser you know. I am at home she is in school and almost done. She has started giving attitudes. You know am not surprised. When you tell a girl she is the only one you have, she starts taking you for granted and all that. Let's just forget it friend.

    Toto:
    I understand your position friend more than you could ever imagine. I fell into the same depth when I was still at home. In fact, my own was more serious than yours. It was painful. When you got pulled into a relationship by a girl and the girl got you so serious about it but along the line, to change the whole story to something very horrid. It pained me but you know, ''a gecko that thinks it owns the whole night has certainly forgotten lizards own the whole day''.
    She kept telling me she had someone else, someone better, you know, she even showed me the engagement ring and the pictures they took together. So, I thought about it very well and said well, since it has changed into that, that means we are just friends after long years of being together. I let her know my stance and she acted it is fine and would not want the husband to be to know there is even friendship twixt us. So, the only one picture we had together she deleted and warned me not to tag her anymore into pictures on social networks.

    Zozo:
    What! Is it Mopo?

    Toto:
    Yes.

    Zozo:
    Guy, why are you just telling me this now?

    Toto:
    I am so very sorry, it is a story I do not like remembering let alone telling. But to cheer you up is the reason am telling you now. Let me quickly paraphrase the rest, we need to go out.
    So there was a day I was walking past her place, I called to greet her parents. When I got there I got to know she had been around for weeks. I asked her why she would not let me know. She said she forgot. Well, we sat and talked outside, it was in the night. She told me she needed money for something so very important and what she needed it for. I did not know if she was telling the truth or the otherwise. Luckily for her, I had just collected my salary. I dipped my hand in my back pocket, counted the exact amount she said she needed and asked her to have it. But her reply really was the last straw that killed it all because I wanted give her that money for no purpose but to help. She said, ''I cannot take it, because if I do ehn, that would open door for you to propose to me''.

    Zozo:
    Awww... That was childish.

    Toto:
    I was expecting you to say so. :)

    Zozo:
    I put the money back and promised not to come back there again. That was the last time I saw her really. A friend close to me and close to her told me till now she is still single.

    Toto:
    Gush! And what about now? Any other lady in your life now?

    Zozo:
    Yes of cause, a better one, in fact the best of the best. She is studying pharmacy. Wait, let me show you her picture.

    Toto:
    Oh boy! You caught a good fish. I hope she has the right attitude! Physical beauty dies but the inner lives for ever as you would always say you remember?

    Zozo:
    Of cause I do. We met when I gained admission.
    So if you are being pushed away by a girl because of your right heart and because you have no leverage. Eat the dirt and never give up. There is nobody like her but there are millions more that better her. Prayer, patience and or fortitude does it bro.

    Toto:
    Awww... All right. Let us go out.

    Zozo:
    Put the bottle in its crate there at the entrance. Let me go and take my bathe, dress and we go out pal.

    Jodekss
    ©2015

    Mother Suwa by Jodekss Gloatkenf

    By : Beryl

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  • Chapter 1
    Welcoming the Twins
    Ade
    My heart raced speedily as I paced up and down the waiting room of the hospital with my wife in the labour room. Mixed emotions clouded my thinking faculty as my thoughts went haywire like a rogue firework. The thoughts included me being a father, me being a single parent, my child coming out a stillborn and losing both wife and baby.
    I no longer felt the pain emanating from the injury I sustained earlier and was no longer hungry as she had been preparing  breakfast when her water broke and I rushed her to the hospital. I wondered why mothers go through physical pain but the fathers go through the psychological pain therefore it was selfish that mothers think that they alone went through childbirth.
    She had been in labour for the past eight hours and had refused vehemently to undergo a caesarian section even after pleas from me, my parents and her parents. To be honest I was scared to my marrows.
    Two hours later, ten hours after she had been wheeled into the labour room, the doctor came out with his stethoscope around his neck, removing his latex gloves and a very bright smile across his face he said "congratulations Mr Ade, you have given birth to two bouncing baby boys".
    I jumped up then gathered my wits, "how is my wife?"
    "She is fine, just exhausted but besides that, she is fine."
    I jumped again and asked "can I go and see her?"
    "Of course, you can" he replied
    I rushed from the waiting room into the nursery. At the door, I composed myself and went in like I didn't panic or rejoice wildly earlier. I went in stealthily and crept silently to where my wife laid. She was peaceful in her sleep; one of the things I always loved about her. I looked into the cot and saw my twins. I wasn't prepared for what happened next as what I saw drained the color from my face.
    Sade
    I was preparing rice and stew and plantain in the kitchen ; my sweetheart's favorite food when my tummy contracted. It was a short contraction at first so I shrugged it off. I added more seasoning to the stew on the left-back face of the gas cooker while the rice an Olatunbosun 
    occupied the left and right front burners respectively.
    The second contraction wasn't so subtle as it struck me and left me on my knees. I couldn't bear it anymore I screamed as much as my lungs could allow.
    My husband ran in and saw me on the floor holding my protruded belly. As he made to carry me, his elbow struck the handle of the frying pan and the hot oil turned on his body. He made a muffled groan as he lifted me to the car.
    I was screaming so loud that I was trying to tell myself to power down the noise but I couldn't bring myself to. Carrying a pregnancy was a different scenario from f
    giving birth. Deep down in my heart I was apologising for all the wrong I've wronged my mother.
    We eventually got to our family hospital and the nurse at the reception on sighting us immediately picked up the intercom and in a matter of seconds left. I was met by two nurses wheeling a gurney. I was placed on the and wheeled into the labour room and switched to the bed.
    The efficiency with which I was attended to made me feel like an egg requiring tender care  and them chefs handling things with finesse. My clothes were substituted for hospital briefs. Three minutes later, the Doctor on call strode In and attended to me.
    After three hours of hard labor, the doctor suggested that I was too tight and I required a caesarian section . A dark joke crossed my mind, if criminals are sentenced to prison with hard labour, was this what the judges meant? It seemed funny but I couldn't laugh at the joke at that time.
    I rejected the proposition and stood my ground on giving birth the conventional way. Ade, my husband came in and pleaded withe but his pleas fell on deaf ears. Five hours after I had been in the labor room, my parents came in and pleaded with me which I declined . Ade's mom also came to talk with me and I declined too.
    I kept pushing but it was futile. I screamed like a banshee and I was sure that the louvres cracked. Ade kept fidgeting and the nurses ushered him out on the doctors orders.
    Eventually after so many snapping at the doctor and calling for Ade at the top of my voice, I was delivered. After the birth of the first of the twins, the second one was easier.
    I was transfered to the nursery, the twins were bathed and laid in my arms. As I looked at them, my eyes welled up and the torrents began. I was doomed, cursed and this wasn't even the beginning of my problems and I knew it in my heart of hearts.
    One of the nurses came to me and pouted, "tears of joy I presume, twins are a blessing." I sighed and she started singing "everything na double double". Deep down I knew the twins were a curse, a plague.
    I sighed and told the nurse to help me put them in the cot as I appeared very weak to move. I laid on my side and was sobbing heavily but quietly. I heard the door open and I could tell from the way the feet moved with so much stealth, it was Ade.
    Ade had the uncanny ability to move quietly that he often bragged that he was a ninja in his previous life. When asked how he knew he'll just respond that he used to dream about it.
    As soon as I felt his presence, I closed my eyes and pretended I was asleep. He came close to me and I could tell that he smiled. I thought I was prepared for what was coming but I wasn't prepared enough. I just heard him mutter " oh, my God".
    Chapter Two
    Ade
    First things first, I am a sucker for beautiful women, its a heirloom. My mother is a goddess even at fifty years she still gives young ladies a run for their money. Even after having a ravishing woman for a wife, my father still philanders around earning him the nickname "Casanova" among his friends.
    I met Sade at my best friend; Tola's birthday party and we became close. Sade was what my hostel guys would call " up NEPA". She was so light I was sure she could light up a room with no electricity.
    She had huge eyes that I nicknamed her "froggy". The magic of the eyes did not stop with the size, it was a very beautiful sight with walnut brown pupils which were very hypnotic.
    Tola has been my friend from secondary school. He moved to Nigeria from Britain. His mother was British while his father was Nigerian. He had this knack for getting into trouble and was one strike away from getting into the juvenile system before his father decided to bring him to Nigeria.
    He was tall, handsome, light skinned with scruffy hair. He had blue eyes that looked fragile and glassy. He had a pierced ear which indicated that he used to put ear-rings but according to the school rules, he could not put them on.
    While everybody fawned on Tola, I didn't even blink towards him which made him wonder who I really was. One day during dinner, he came up and hurled an obscenity at me. I got up and slapped him. It was that day I realised that not all "aje butter" are weaklings.
    He reciprocated with the slap and a full brawl ensued. The brawl left me with a busted eyebrow, a busted nose and a swollen jaw while he had a black eye, busted lips; upper and lower and a bleeding ear.
    We were punished by the school. After we were beaten on the Assembly ground in front of the whole school. My parents were sent for and I was given the worst tongue lashing I have ever had in my life as it came from three sources; my father, mother and our principal.  Tola was lucky, none of his family was around to give him the rites that I just paased through. The school authority sent us to work on the school farm for two weeks and added a two-week suspension to our punishment.
    On the day our suspension was supposed to begin, I went to him and asked hi. If he had a place to stay and he responded in the negative, I asked him if he could stay at my place for the duration of the suspension. He agreed without any further pressure.
    My parents punished me by not sending our driver to come pick me in school therefore I had to find my way home. My parents might be rich but we were raised with sternly. I called my dad the Iron Fist. To get home, I had to beg a couple of my friends for loans which they assisted me with.
    On getting home, Tola and I went straight into my room as my parents were not around and my elder sister was on campus. I pillaged the kitchen to see if there was food but I could find none. Our pantry was locked with a brand new padlock it was then I knew my punishment from school had extended home because we never locked our pantry and there was always food at home. The fridge only had water in it and none of the drinks it used to have.
    I took the remaining money I had on me, added some from Tola and I went out to get Bread and local beans which we ate and slept off without clearing the place we ate. I was awoken by  the rumbling  clang of our gate opened by Adamu, our gateman.
    It was my father the Iron Fist, I looked around, and remembered we had not cleared the spot we ate, I tried doing that but it was too late as my father caught me in the act.
    "Mike Tyson, " he started  "I see you've treated yourself to a fine meal. I understand, fighting is a very exhausting business. You need food to replenish the lost energy."
    I stood rooted on the spot and all I could say was "welcome sir"
    "It is I that should be welcoming you. I hope you had a stress free journey."
    I kept mute.
    "Ade, you're an idiot, you show no sign of remorse for your actions yet you have the nerve to eat in this house. I thought I asked Maria to lock the pantry."
    On further scrutiny of my hand he saw the bread nylon and that infuriated him the more. He didn't like us buying food outside.
    "Now my son is buying food by the roadside like an urchin." He threw a slap at me which I dodged. Then from nowhere I heard subtle voice
    "I have ulcer, that's why he rushed to get it for me when I had an attack Sir. He hasn't even eaten because according to him, he has no right to eat because he feels ashamed of what he did."
    It was Tola, the whole world stood still, I wondered if he salvaged the situation or blew it straight to hell.
    "Is this not the boy you fought?" My father asked
    "He is sir" I replied shakily
    "What is he doing here?"
    "His parents are in England and he doesn't know any of his relatives' place and I thought that since I brought this on him, I couldn't leave him to wander the unfriendly streets alone."
    "Hmmm, that's okay. Go to your room."
    My father is the kind of person who loves people taking responsibility for their actions instead of apportioning blame and it worked like magic. That was the last reference to my suspension in our house.
    Tola and I bonded and we returned to school as best friends and he spent the holidays at my house. I went over with him to England for summer holidays.
    Tola got admission into Obafemi Awolowo University to study Law while I got admission to study Pertochemical Engineering at the University of Port Harcourt. Distance didn't serve as a barrier at all to us. We exchanged long visits during breaks.
    Tola graduated with a First Class while I graduated with a Second Class Upper Division. We got jobs immediately after service: I with an Oil Company and Tola floated his own firm with a long list of clients from my dad and his dad who had decided to have a network in Nigeria.
    I met Sade on his 31st birthday party hosted by his fiancée Susan. I saw the whole world flicker in her eyes and I was mesmerized but hey, its a player's thing. We love beautiful things. I went in for the kill and I made the kill successfully.
    After The Birth
    I looked at the twins in the cot and I couldn't believe what I saw. In that same instant, my parents came in with my Elder sister who had flown in to spend summer with us. On seeing the twins, she looked me in the eyes but I couldn't meet her gaze.
    "Ade, meet me outside right now" she commanded.
    On getting outside, she looked at me ad said, "how come your twins look like your best friend? Night"
    Chapter 3
    One Wild
    Ade
    "How come your twins look like your best friend?" My sister asked with clenched teeth.
    "Its a long story" I replied
    "Does it look like I'm in a hurry? I've got all summer"
    "Okay then, I'll tell you"
    Fifteen Months Ago
    I saw the world flicker in those huge eyeballs and I said to myself, this is a goddess. I moved up to her,
    "You know, if the music wasn't so loud and I can see my friend here, I would probably think I am in heaven"
    "And why would you think so?" She asked with a flirtatious blink of those eyes.
    " Because I am definitely speaking with an angel. Does God know you are here?"
    "Well, sure he does."
    "Then I am sure that he sent you here specifically for me. Pardon my manners, its not everyday one stands in the presence of an angel, my name is Ade."
    "I am Sade"
    "Exactly what I was saying. Ade, Sade, you were sent here for me. Do you wanna know what the 'S' stands for?"
    "Humour me"
    "Soulmate"
    It was that moment that I saw her teeth. Neatly arranged, sparkling white like snow. Her front teeth were a bit huge but they actually complemented her huge eyeballs. She smiled coyly and said
    "And we thought all the smooth moves ended with Casanova"
    "We have got James Bond. But to be frank, I would like to get to know you better"
    "How would you propose we do that?"
    "Out of the vast array of numbers in the world, I just need you to spare me a few so I can reach you with"
    "Okay then,"
    She gave me her number and everything went downhill from there. I never had any intention of getting serious with her. She was just another game to me. Winners win, losers lose while players play. That was the rule of life.
    While we were in school, whenever Tola and I exchanged visits, we always took turns on the same lady. It was a ritual, we shared that bond until he met Susan. Susan was the only lady he dated that we didn't pass on. I wasn't pissed, we all had to grow up someday.
    One night, Susan had travelled to see her ailing mother and I came visiting from my base. I asked Sade to meet me at Tola's place.
    We went clubbing, drank our hearts out. We were practically wasted, Tola drove us home but I had no recollection of that. What I had a recollection of was that I heard groans and flesh smacking flesh. The groans were filled with mention of "Susan, Susan, Susan"
    I wiped my face downwards with my hand and saw Tola on Sade enjoying himself erotically. An alarm went off in my head but it cooled off, it was our rites, I hadn't written Sade off as out of bounds to him so she was still fair game.
    When he got off, I made a mental note to break off with Sade the following week. I took my turn on her and went back to sleep. The following morning I saw Sade crying profusely in the bathroom. I shrugged and eased myself in the toilet.
    "So this is the kind of person you are. You are a heartless individual. Wicked ought to be your middle name. You don't deserve the name Ade because you don't act like one who would be king. Your name should be 'bata (shoe)' because you are full of filth."
    It was at this point that I realised that I was having feelings for her. I bent down, held her in my arms, feigned ignorance and asked her what happened.
    "Ade don't take me for a fool, so you want to faign ignorance of the fact that you and Tola took turns in having sex with me?"
    "I swear to you, I had no idea. This is one of the reasons I don't drink. I lose my semses and start misbehaving"
    "Don't blame it on the drink, the drink only brought out your innermost desires"
    "Of course it did, but I wanted it to be very special, spectacular not something as crude as this. I feel like killing myself right now"
    "Ade Ade, you must be a very good actor. Its all so convincing"
    "I swear I am telling you the truth. Okay let me show you."
    I grabbed her neck and kissed her lips sensually. She reciprocated and we got lost in passion. It was fireworks all through as I went in and our of her.
    From then on, we became an item. I notice Tola didn't support our relationship but I didn't care. I loved Sade and nothing was going to stop me from spending the rest of my life with her.
    Three months later, she told me she was three months pregnant, we conducted an introduction about a month later and got married a month after that.
    "You are a disgrace and a fool Ade "my sister fumed through clenched teeth after she had dazed me with a stunning slap. "So this is the nonsense you guys do. Well, nemesis seems to have caught up with you and trust me, this is sweet nemesis just that it had to happen to my brother."
    I rubbed the point where the slap hit me and my thoughts drifted back to the twins in the cot that had glassy eyes and scruffy hair. Everybody knew who the twins belonged to. I couldn't hold my head up. I was ashamed, karma had played a fast one on me.
    My Father came out of the nursery and saw me sitting with my head buried in my palms. I was weeping silently then he placed his right  hand on my shoulder. It was obvious my sister had told them what I told her. Better her than me, I wasn't sure I could tell anybody else, it felt heavy.
    "Son," my father started, "youthfulness comes with a special adrenaline pump. You see yourself getting bold enough to do things you wouldn't have thought of doing but dwelling on the past wouldn't solve future problems. What we need now is the way forward."
    At this point, I hugged my father hard and started crying loud and I could hear him say "son, now that's embarrassing. Get your act together. Man up and take responsibility for your actions."
    He stood up, held out his hand which I took and he pulled me up. I had made a decision deep down in my mind and I was sure it was going to seem absurd.

    Chapter Four
    Regrets
    The Truth  (Part One)
    Ade
    Sade was discharged from the hospital after three days due to the amount of energy she had expended. For that three days, there hung an air of uncertainty and awkwardness between us. After dropping us at home, my parents left for their place. It was time for me to man up.
    I leaned in to Sade, kissed her cheek,
    "Everything will be alright baby. I caused all this and its my mess to clean up. I'm sorry for all the pain I might have caused you. We'll get through this baby. I love you. We'll raise the twins together."
    "Ade, are you sure of what you're saying, you want to raise kids that are not yours?"
    "Family isn't only relationship by blood. I'll raise them as mine at least they belong to my brother too."
    "You're just too good Ade, but what would people say?"
    " Its their funeral, not mine. I choose how to run my family so its a no contest."
    "What if Tola decides he wants to claim them?"
    "He can have them if he decides to claim them immediately"
    At this point I stood up and left for the kitchen to prepare something for us to eat.
    Sade
    I couldn't believe what my ears just heard. I had expected a civil war but I just got a mind relieving dialogue. I didn't deserve this man. He's just too good for me. If only he knew the truth.
    Susan and I met in our first year in the University. We were in the same hostel and we got really close. We decided to rent an apartment off campus. We rented a two bedroom flat and divided the rooms between ourselves although we slept together most of the time, either my room or hers.
    Truth be told, Susan was an angel but traces of resentment started setting in when Linus, my then boyfriend started making advances towards her. She decided to teach him a lesson.
    Truth be told, she had given me the heads up about the whole scenario but I think she took things a bit too far.
    After so much pressure from Linus, she caved in and fixed a rendezvous in a popular hotel. Linus arrived first and he booked a room. Susan came in not long after and they went in.
    Not long after, she came out. Evidently nothing had happened because she claimed she had told him her menses came without warning leaving Linus frustrated. Little did Linus know that unfinished sex was the least of his problems.
    Two days later, a video went viral. A naked, aphrodisiac fueled Linus with an erection begging a lady whose face had been digitally blurred for at least a blow job to subdue his erection.
    Linus went incommunicado for a whole semester after the scandal. I missed him, I knew of his philandering but I overlooked it because I loved him. Susan might have thought she was fighting for me but she went too far. I needed to get my own pound of flesh.
    When she introduced Tola to me as her boyfriend, a handsome guy with a movie star looks. I was weak all the way down to my knees. I saw this as killing two birds with one stone. I started giving him signal which he seemingly ignored.
    One day when  Susan travelled home, I was all alone at home so I locked all the doors. I was about drifting into dreamland when i heard knocks on the door. With a flurry of low toned obscenities fueled by my love for beauty sleep, I finally traipsed to the door.
    Opening the door, my anger dissipated. I threw my hands around the guest's neck.
    " Uncle Tola what are you doing here? Susan has travelled home"
    "Hmmm, I know. I was in the neighbourhood and I knew you'd be bored so I said I should help you kill boredom."
    "How thoughtful of you. What should I offer you?"
    "I was thinking we could hang out."
    "Wow! No problem then. Let me change then."
    As I opened my door to go inside, I felt a grip around my waist from the back and a sweet scent filled my nose. Then he planted a kiss on the nape of my neck.
    "Uncle Tola, what are you doing?"
    "Responding to the signals you sent to me"
    "So you caught on to them, why didn't you respond earlier?"
    "Susan is very perceptive. She catches on to things quickly so I had to act as if I didn't see anything."
    " You are a bad guy Uncle Tola"
    "Uncle bad guy to you"
    Everything went downhill from there, we started meeting each other clandestinely and Susan never suspected a thing. I'll lie to Susan that I was going home but it was a meet between Uncle Tola and I.
    This went on then I started growing feelings for Uncle Tola but he wasn't ready to leave Susan. I was not ready to lose twice in this game. I tried blackmailing him to leave Susan but he called my bluff reminding me of what befell Linus and how many folds that would be for me.
    Truth be told, I was dead scared of Susan. She didn't belong to any Sorority yet the sorority girls were scared of her. I decided to count my losses. Whenever Tola came around, I would either stay in my room or go out.
    On his birthday, I had first decided I was not going to attend so I told Susan I was going home to see my parents but she begged me that she needed a trusted pair of hands to assist her in organizing the party so I obliged.
    I was bored until Ade walked into the picture with his sweet mouth. He was the highlight of the party for me and I was glad I attended it.
    I told Susan about Ade knowing fully well she would tell Tola which she did. A week after his birthday, I saw his call on my phone but I hung up immediately I picked it. I repeated the cycle five times then he sent me a text.
    "I know I deserve that, can we see? Let's talk."
    I replied with "time and place?"
    He sent me the venue and time and I told him I'll be there.
    I made for the venue which was a bar not very far from our place. On getting there, I saw him sipping on a bottle of Fayrouz. I eyeballed him as he welcomed me with a warm smile.
    "Here I am thinking you were going to stand me up. So glad you proved me wrong."
    "Are we here for small talks or you really want to talk?"
    "Come on Sade, you know you used to love the foreplay"
    "I'm not in the mood"
    "Okay then, I don't want you dating Ade. Is that straight to the point enough for you?"
    "My dad is at home and I don't remember him using and dumping me"
    "Now that's bitterness talking, you knew the game was dangerous before you decided to play it. Don't hate the player, hate the game."
    "Well, it's okay. I'm not leaving Ade alone. Have it in mind, blackmailing me won't work this time, I'm willing to lose all, but the question remains   'are you?"
    He shifted in his seat, a sign that he was cracking. Then I turned on the heat.
    "Ever wondered what happened to those kinky videos we made? I burned them on lovely DVDs. Truth be told I loved our sessions, you were like a psychologist giving me therapy. Such a shame you saw it fit to end the good thing we shared. No hard feelings though."
    "You diabolical bitch" he snarled
    "What breed is your mother? Look, if this is what you called me here for, I think we are over it."
    I ordered grilled fish and two bottles of big Orijin and I told the barman to place it on Tola's tab.
    "Let's call this a farewell flexing. Truth be told, you sure as hell know how to treat a lady right but you messed it up at one point, bringing Linus in. It showed you were unsecured. You wanted to eat your cake and have it. You can only have your cake and eat it bro. Uncle bad guy."
    After finishing my order, i made sure i belched then I stood up, kissed him on the lips deeply and whispered "goodbye" into his ear before biting his ear sexually. I winked at him as I was taking my leave.
    Ade and I had been exchanging calls  and truth be told, no matter how much I felt for him, my heart still yearned for Tola but I needed a consolation prize and Ade was it.
    Chapter Five
    Regrets
    The Truth (Part Two)
    Sade
    I couldn't afford to lose out in this game. It just wasn't fair so I had to come out with a win, albeit a consolation one and Ade was it. Ade was what the proverbial cat dragged in.
    When Ade came into the picture, I was skeptic at first but it had taken a shaken resolve to actually make a solid resolve.
    When Ade had requested that we meet, I felt a little bit of hope, maybe fortune had decided to finally smile upon me. This would probably be my chance to salvage something.
    It felt awkward when Tola tagged along. He was giving me a very sinister look which I reciprocated with a sinister smile fueled by anxiety. I was busy wondering if Tola would spill the beans but he just kept sipping his drink noisily with a lot of grumbling.
    "Tola, what's the matter with you? Susan left you?" Ade asked jokingly.
    "Just having one of those days man" Tola replied with a shrug.
    "Are you sure?"
    "Dude, you damn right I am. Sorry for venting but I really need some mental calm right now."
    The short exchange had felt like it went on forever and my heart started beating furiously. Was this the end? I was dying a lot faster until I heard the conversation ender that Tola threw into the mix then my heartbeat gradually but eventually returned to normal.
    My threat had worked, I threw up my hands mentally in a sign of triumph. I flashed him a look of gratitude in the dim light and somehow he managed to catch up to it and threw it all in my face with an eyeball rolling which I countered with a subtle hiss.
    Then it started to rain heavily. Although we were protected in the car, we had to alight and walk into Tola's flat which was on the other end of the compound from where he parked his car.
    We lingered a bit and after a short while, as if on cue we all got out of the car and braced the torrential downpour and as if the rain had a mind of its own, it increased its tempo. We eventually got into Tola's flat. The first time for me as all our tryst had been on a neutral ground.
    To be honest, it was well set. The setee was made of pure leather, with well polished wooden frame. On his wall hung a 64 inch Samsung LCD television and to accompany it was a Samsung Home Theatre system. He had the speakers complemented with Zealot speakers. If we were on speaking terms I'd have asked him if he wanted to bring down the walls of Jericho for the second time. He had a brown Persian rug in the middle of the sitting room.
    Also on display was a series of autographed photographs by various celebrities. He had one fr Wayne Rooney, John Terry an actor I recognized from a Hollywood flick among many more. He hung a bronze cast on the wall amidst various oil on canvass paintings.
    Truth be told, I was really impressed. It wasn't like my parents weren't well to do but this was a young man with exquisite taste. He was living the good life and truth be told, in that moment I had almost moved to bury the hatchet but reason dictated otherwise. He drew the first blood, it was only right I drew last.
    He led Ade and I into the guest room. He tried initiating a conversation with Ade which Ade responded with a drunken grunt. In that moment Ade got up and sauntered into the bathroom.
    Tola came to me, I pretended to be asleep.
    "Sade, Sade" he whispered as he tapped me.
    "Hmmmm, what is it?" I responded in a fake slumber tone.
    "Let's talk"
    "Can't it wait till morning? I want to sleep, besides you had all evening to talk to me. That enough shows its not of much importance therefore it can definitely wait till morning".
    In that moment, I had willed Ade to come out without any success.
    " Sade I love you. I can't allow you to date Ade out of spite for me. I'll do anything for you."
    The lyrics to the song that I had longed to hear but didn't know the tune yet. I felt a surge of joy leap directly from my stomach to my throat. If there was no huge amount of restraint I might have yelped for joy.
    I decided to play it coyly.
    "Is this out of jealousy or you in a sincere mode?"
    "Jealousy? Nah. Jealousy is for the petty. Why would you think me petty? Come on, I mean it."
    "What took you so long to say it then?"
    "They say you never know what you've got till its gone. It took me seeing you already had one foot outside before I found myself longing for you."
    It was in this instant that he scooped the lower of my back and drew me close. He planted a kiss then we started what led to this.
    I had always enjoyed having him inside of me but as he approached climax, he called out Susan's name repeatedly and I realized I stood no chance.
    Ade came up on me and took his turn. I was too defeated to fight back. I had lost in a big way. What did I expect? I had fallen for his sweet talks and like a classic stupid girl, I had melted at the sound of loved mentioned.
    I cried myself to sleep that night, I cried in my sleep and in my dream and I cried myself awake. I had lost the consolation prize I looked to have won. There was no way he would look at me twice again, heck! I couldn't even look at myself i n the mirror.
    When Ade picked me up from the bathroom floor and planted a kiss on my lips, it was that day I experienced love making for the first time. He had me so gently and still I was feeling violently woozy on cloud 9.
    After that encounter, Ade and I saw each other frequently, had our love making sessions. I couldn't always wait to see him. Hearing his voice on the phone always made my loins tingle so much that I had to cross my legs to rid myself of the sensation. This proved the usual saying that 'God would take you through hell just to get you to heaven'. Ade was my heaven on earth.
    Three months after the unpleasant encounter, I started feeling strange. I couldn't stay on my feet for long, morning sickness followed. If it was a typical Nollywood flick, I would have judged myself pregnant. I tried not to assume the worst since I was an optimist and assumption is the mother of all fuck ups and disasters so I took a walk to the pharmacy and bought myself a pregnancy test strip .
    I was filled with mixed emotions while I was waiting for the result on the strip. Those five minutes seemed like an eternity. So many scenarios popped up in my head, the waves were so much that I couldn't even pick up on any. I was bonkers.
    I checked the result and it indicated positive. My feet wobbled and went out of commission in that Instant. I broke down completely and started sobbing uncontrollably. I was finished. How did this happen? Who was I kidding? We had unprotected sex, what was I expecting?
    In that moment, his call came in. What usually gave me joy now gave me a dread. I had never felt this naked in my life. Ade was a source of joy, and i was on the brink of chasing him. I started feeling like I had a self destructive tendency, it was now becoming a pattern. I had no one else to blame, I was responsible.
    I passed out on the bathroom after crying my brains out. I was certain I had cried out all the hydrants in my body. I woke up with a nasty migraine. I managed to get up, I checked my phone, I had twenty-five missed calls from Ade as well as eight messages all carrying a tone of worry.
    I started thinking clearly, maybe because I no longer had tears to shed. I sent him a message telling him I was pregnant which he replied with
    "are you serious?"
    "As a heart attack" I replied
    "Great news, see you after work baby. I love you"
    He came around that night and I found out I had been making a mountain out of a mole hill. Ade took the news with so much joy that I started beating myself up mentally about my stupid panic I had gotten myself into.
    He took me out that night, there he proposed to me. It was an elaborate proposal that I wondered how he could plan so much in a little time window. He had the ring served as a dish, the deejay played Bruno Mars' marry you in that same moment. I saw Ade go on his knees the song paused and Ade said
    'I know I might not have spent may years on this earth, but I'm sure as hell wanna spend the rest with you. Folasade, would you marry me?"
    I went mute, my tongue was literally tied, my eyes welled up with tears and I covered my mouth with both hands with my left palm overlapping my right palm over my mouth. The whole restaurant had gone silent and all eyes had fixed on us. Ade still on his knees said with his suave voice
    "Still waiting for your response baby"
    I shook my head  the as if my voice box had been reactivated I screamed
    "Yes Ade mi, I would marry you, I would spend the rest of my life in your world. I want you to become my King, my everything. I love you Ade, I love you"
    The whole restaurant went from graveyard silence to deafening noisy with whistling and applause. The ladies in the restaurant came to congratulate me with hugs while the men shook Ade and patted him on the back. They offered him funny advices. Our lives together started that day.
    Tola
    I couldn't believe my ears, I hit the receiving end of my phone on my palms repeatedly then spoke into the phone
    "Susan what did you say?"
    "Its over Tola, do you need me to spell it out to you?"
    Chapter Six
    Regrets
    The Truth (Part Three)
    I couldn't believe my ears. Nemesis was such an unpleasant fellow. I was done for. So all my good intentions had turned sour. Truth be told, I really loved Susan, she is the first lady I have ever given my heart to but I guess it true that love alone doesn't cut it in dating.
    Truth be told I was pissed when I discovered that Ade was going after Sade but it wasn't out of jealousy, it was because I knew that he deserved more, better than Sade. Sade was a demon in the sack but that was about the only thing she was good for.
    Sade could drain the great Casanova of sexual appetite and still never have her fill. She was a nympho. Truth be told, I learned a thing or two things from her but they were all sexual. She definitely had nothing else to bring to the table besides a nice piece of ass and beauty. She was a pestilence and a pain in the ass.
    I should have told Ade about our side tryst before I went to tell her off Ade. I discovered Ade was obsessed with her but I had wanted to cut the feelings off at the source. I thought if she snubbed Ade, he would look further.
    I had the perfect plan but one thing I did not account for was that she might have grown a spine. Her brazen approach knocked me off balance. I could not believe my ears, she burnt our sessions on a DVD. It was scandalous to say the least. I should have called her bluff that night but I wasn't prepared for her brazenness so I wasn't equipped with a tool to counter it.
    That night I was lost in thoughts, I couldn't let my friend marry that tramp. She was worse than useless. I started making strategies on how to get her off Ade's back. I ranted to Ade about her but I could not tell him the truth without her suspecting it was me and I was not prepared to lose Susan.
    When Ade called that he wanted to see Sade, I had offered to tag along as an idea had popped into my head. On seeing her, my mood switched but I had to do it. So I went mute and dour voluntarily.
    Going to meet her had taken all my acting skills as I had hated her with all my heart. I had to make Ade see she was nothing than a piece of fine ass. I told her I loved her because that was her unlocking key. She was insecure with a high level of low self esteem. What was my friend doing with her?
    I managed to get her to open her legs while I dug in and made sure Ade was aware. I was glad when I heard Ade come into the room from the toilet. Now she wouldn't mean anything to him. My plan had definitely worked. It made me increase my tempo. I started moaning Susan as I reached my climax so she would realize that I had tricked her. She had lost again.
    They say "one event can create a chain of other unrelated events". The thing with the unrelated events is that they are often disastrous. I had made a fatal mistake. While I was about going into Sade, I had put on a condom but during the session, I had no idea it had torn not until I climaxed. I shrugged it off, she's a big girl, she will take care of herself I thought.
    When Ade told me he proposed, I was livid. I could hear all my alarms blaring in my head.
    " Ade, what is this nonsense you are telling me?"
    "That I am getting married to Sade of course"
    "Is it that you're plain stupid or you're joking with me?"
    "If I was joking, would it ameliorate your blown fuse?"
    "Maybe, but your looks tell me its not a joke"
    " That's because it isn't . I thought you'd be happy for me. Besides I'm not growing any younger. You're the best man. Take it or leave it. I don't know why you hate that poor girl so much."
    "Hey, hold it right there, best man for who? You and that tramp? I'd be your best man if you were marrying my sister and you sure know how protective i am of her but not Sade. Dude, don't let her loins blind you. If it's great sex you want, there are so many fine pieces of ass out there you can dig into but not her. Come on Ade, we both slept with this girl."
    "Tola, she's pregnant for me and you know how I don't shy away from my responsibility. I can't abort my first seed. So if you're not going to support me, I might as well look for someone else to be my best man."
    Truth be told, I had a lot of respect for Ade and the way he took responsibility for his actions so I could not stay angry at him for too long. He had a way of disarming me. Ever since we had our fisticuffs, we had never had a major quarrel. It was like the fight unlocked our inner affections for each other.
    "I'll be your best man"
    "Are you serious?"
    "Ask me one more time" I said with mock anger
    "I dare not do that"
    "You think I'm going to let our years together go down the drain over a lady so much I wouldn't walk you down the aisle? Its actually a funeral"
    "Funeral? How do you mean?"
    "Weddings are players' funerals"
    He smiled brightly,
    "Fool, get me a drink"
    "You know where the drinks are, get it yourself. Let me finish this stage. Its been defeating me since last night and you know video games are my wives and mistresses." I said as I sank in my chair and resumed my video game.
    "Speaking of wives and mistresses, dude, don't you think about settling down? You ain't no kid anymore or do you want my kids to call you by your first name until you get married or do you want to wait until you're dragging a girl with my first son before you consider it?"
    "Dude, face your wedding and after that we can both face mine. 'Aproko'"
    The wedding was very elaborate, I got some contacts for my firm and I also scored me some points with the ladies because Susan was so busy being the Best lady. I scored up on Sade's sister at the reception. I scored up three ladies at the reception and got a lot of numbers. I mused to myself that if being a Best man was this fun, I might consider being a bachelor for the rest of my life.
    Ade called and told me Sade had given birth to a set of twins, all boys. I was happy for him but he sounded so odd, like he wasn't pleased with the news. Then he sent me the pictures via WhatsApp and I saw what had made him sound casual.
    I felt dizzy all of a sudden. I groped the air to find a seat as I was unaware of my surroundings and my vision had blurred. I finally grabbed a seat then I propped myself. I smashed the phone on the wall and buried my face in my palms tearily. What have I done? I should have just left them alone.
    My small phone rang, I checked the caller I'd, it was Susan
    "Hey baby, what's up?" I asked managing to clear the pain from my voice
    "Well, I just saw Sade's twins, guess what, they look like you. Handsome, cute smiles scruffy hair. Wow! You're such a snake. I hate you, so you were sleeping with my best friend all along. Well, I hope you rot in hell forever. That's where snakes go. Its over between us!"
    "Susan, what do you mean?"
    "I said its over, do you need me to spell it out for you. Okay then grab a crayon, you can scribble it on the wall, I,T,I,S,O,V,E,R,B,E,T,W,E,E,N,U,S. Got it? Good bye playboy."
    She hung the phone up on me.
    I tried calling her back but she kept hanging up on me then she switched off her phone. I had only one option left
    Ade
    When I saw the caller, I was reluctant to pick the call but I eventually did.
    "Hey Susan"
    "You've killed him" she sniffed as she sobbed on the phone
    "I hope you eat his corpse, I hope you're happy now....
    Chapter Seven
    A Snake cut in half
    Tola
    "Damn!" I swore out loud. I can't believe what was happening. I couldn't help but think about the irony of nemesis. This payback was on a major scale. It was barbaric in nature more like old testament vengeance. This was just tearing into anything in its way.
    Deep down in my mind, I'd have given anything to take everything I had done back. I really wanted to but life doesn't give that premium. I picked up my car keys decided to take the long drive to see Susan and sort things out once and for all. She was the first and only girl I was afraid to lose.
    I lost concentration several times on my way but I finally made it there. She did allow the gateman to let me in. She had left standing orders. I picked my phone, dialled her number several times but she kept hanging up on me. I sent her texts in quick succession which I was sure she read but did not acknowledge.
    I decided her temper was still brewing, so I decided to give her a few days to cool off. She would definitely come around after sometime. One question still haunted me "would she take me back?" I was not sure.
    Susan was a lady that rarely got angry but she was definitely vengeful. She never let a slight slide. I was scared of her although she gave me some concessions. My chickens had definitely come home to roost.
    Sullenly I went back to my car, started the engine, waited for a moment that seemed like an eternity then I started banging the steering in a blind and furious rage. Furious at myself for getting sloppy. No girl had ever gotten pregnant for me and I always took pride in my skills with the withdrawal method.
    After the venting of my fury on my steering and dashboard, I cooled off for a bit and put the car into drive. I simply went top speed.
    Driving had always been therapeutic for me. I found it soothing for me and it helped me clear my head after a laborious day at work. It helped me in the aspect of not taking work vibes home and also in getting my work vibes back on mode on my way to work but today it was simply malfunctioning.
    I got on the highway and luckily for me, there was no traffic at all. I increased speed suddenly something ran across the road, probably a snake I could not tell as it all happened so fast, reflex kicked in, I swerved left but could not swerve back right. I could feel my whole world tumble. I felt my brain smash against my cranium repeatedly.  
    I was entangled in a battle with gravity, I felt it pull at me but every time I hit the ground, I felt something pull me up again. I was like a doll dragged between two bickering sisters. Eventually gravity won, my car had no glass except for the grains that littered the interior. my whole life was upside down now my world was now upside down.
    Different cars drove by, this told me the car tumbling had ended in the middle of the road. I saw an eighteen-wheeler drive upside down trying to skid to a halt. I had no idea if it did because my world had gone dark before I could find out.
    Ade
    "What do you mean?" I barked back into the phone visibly irritated at Susan's antics. She wasn't one to make unnecessary fuss so this scared me.
    "Tola is in the hospital, he had an accident"
    "What?! When?! How?! Where?!"
    "Don't sell me crap, this is what you've always wanted so stop pretending"
    I got pissed at the remark and went ballistics,
    "Susan, you did this, not me so don't paint yourself a saint because you and I both know you're no saint. You are a villain. We all are, but you, everything you touch withers and dies. If you had done what I asked you to a long ti.e ago, we would not be having this converaation."
    I ended the call angrily, I started pacing the room tensely. I was losing it, I couldn't bear Tola dying. My composure had far dissipated. The snakes cut in half are coming back, it wasn't going to be pleasant at all.
    I knew Susan from my first year in school. We were both in the same department and same level. Truth be told, she was a very intelligent girl but she had a knack for causing trouble and getting out unscathed. It was as if she thrived off of it.
    We were really close, I dated a couple of her friends back then, I liked her but she was too wild for me to tame and we had already grown too close for us to have anything together. Actually it was a wager between my pals and I that I would not sleep with her that restrained me from trying and it earned me her respect.
    Susan was a "man eater", she didn't really get into relationships for anything but for the fun of it. She broke a lot of hearts because she would invest a lot of time and attention at the beginning acting like she really cared only to dump the guy later on. It was just her way, no guy was safe from her charms. Whenever I asked her " why do all this?" She would reply "just for kicks. Its fun paying people with their own coin."
    Truth is, she never dated single guys, she dated players and in the end, she would be like "hey player, I'm the coach". Whenever she used that line, I would bust into uncontrollable laughter.
    Another thing she had was a crazy rage. She rarely got angry but her anger was old testament. She once sent two girls to the hospital for six weeks because they insulted her mother. It was not a fight, it was a mauling. They came back with scarred faces and respect for others' mothers. They used their crutches for the rest of the semester.
    In one of her murderous rage, she had stabbed some dude in the neck with a fork while she was on a date with another guy. The guy had tapped her buttocks, her date had not said anything because the guy was the second in command of the most dreaded confraternity on campus. They put a  " fatwa"out on her. Even the sororities had lent a hand because they hated her, she had snatched some of their boyfriends and dumped them
    She forfeited her admission after one battle in her hostel that left eight sorority sisters dead and her with a bloodied shoulder caused by a single gunshot wound.
    I always wondered how she did it but she always survived. I had not heard from her but the last time I heard about her while i was in school was that the frat boys had paid their house a visit, they seriously wounded her mother but none of them left there alive. Her mom was left in a wheel chair.
    I was surprised when I discovered she was dating Tola. I arranged a meet between us
    "Sue Sue, how have you been?"
    "Ade, life has been rough for me but I'll get by."
    "Life is not a bed of roses. You take it as it comes"
    "My case aside, why did you call up this meet?"
    "I'm sure Tola has told you about our relationship. About how close we are"
    "He said you guys are pretty close"
    "Good, Susan, I like you a lot truth be told and if circumstances were different, I wouldn't have called this meeting. I need you to stop seeing Tola."
    "You idiot, who the hell do you think you are telling me what to do"
    I calmed down, let out a sly smile
    "Its glad to see you've still got that rage"
    "If I did, you'd be in a pool of your own blood. Why are you doing this to me? We used to be best of friends in school. You were the only one who knew my secret, now you're using it against me. I guess its true that two may keep a secret when one is dead"
    "Susan, I am not using it against you, I am saving my friend's life. Do you know that the fatwa is still out on your head?"
    "Of course I do, but the can only try, they can't get me"
    "But they can get someone you love, they got your mother and you couldn't even protect her. My friend is not a warrior, maybe intelligent but he's no fighter. What if you get married and have kids then one day you come back and find your husband and your children in a pool of their own blood? I know he loves you and he wants you but you're bad for his health. You can't protect yourself if you have to think about someone else. If you love him let him go. He'll breakdown for a while but he'll get back up again."
    "Part of me hates you right now, but you are telling me the truth. I haven't really forgiven myself over my mom getting condemned to a wheelchair. It sucks that the first guy I loved in my life has to go because of the things I've done in the past. I'll let him go but you will have to give me some time to arrange it and make it foolproof."
    "Okay then, no problem. Thank you for understanding but please don't let it linger for too long."
    "You were the only one who could always reach me mentally. I always wondered why you never asked me out despite knowing I had the hots for you"
    "I dated a lot of your friends, moreover we were really close"
    "That's no excuse, now tell me the truth"
    "Okay then, I had a wager with Banjo and Chinedu that I wouldn't sleep with you."
    "Why did you make the wager?"
    "They argued that you and I being friends was like using a sugarcane as walking stick, whenever I got thirsty, I'd take a bite."
    "How much was the wager?"
    "A hundred grand"
    "Was it worth it?"
    "As much as I'd love to get laid by you, the respect you gave me was worth more than the money so the wager was worth it."
    We drank some more and we left on amicable basis.
    Presently......
    I didn't even shower as I grabbed my car keys, and set course for the hospital. I did not want to lose my best friend. I could not afford to. I was met with traffic and my frustration grew. I called my dad and narrated the situation to him. I was just venting on anything amd everything. The pressure was getting too much to bear. It was finally getting to me.
    Prior to Susan's call, I had been getting texts from my exes mocking me about karma being a bitch. One of them sent one that read "treated a good girl like trash, got married to one you thought was good, only to discover she was trash. Father your best friend's babies. Ain't karma a bitch".
    I finally got to the hospital after about two and half hour. I asked after the doctor on duty and i was directed to his office. Doctor asked
    " who are you to him?"
    "I'm his brother Ade"
    "He's been mumurring your name since they brought him in but he's in surgery right now"
    "Can I hang around?"
    "Sure"
    "By the way how serious was the accident?"
    "Three broken ribs, compound fracture on both legs, punctured left lung, broken ulna, shattered jaw. It's a miracle he didn't die on the spot."
    I tried to joke
    "He has always been a tough nut to crack"
    I couldn't even laugh at my own joke. My parents came in and hugged me. Our second time together in a hospital in three days.
    "Son, its going to be alright" my father said.
    "It had better be dad, I can't bear this"
    We went in an uncomfortable silence for one more hour when the surgeon came out. We circled around  him like vultures circle around a carcass.
    "I'm sorry but Mr Tola succumbed to his injuries, we lost him"
    I went down in a heap, my vision became blurry and began to cry. My father helped me up and sat me on a chair in the waiting room. I was just smiling amidst the tears.
    "Can we see him doctor?"
    "You will when he's moved to the morgue."
    I was devastated, secretly hoping the doctor would say something like "gotcha" or "April fool" but he didnt . I hoped that Tola would come out from the theatre with his crutch and make a wisecrack like
    "So you believe the bullshit this doctor is selling you. I'm tougher than to die an accidental death."
    It didn't happen, I went to the morgue to see his body. He was still oddly handsome and he seemed like he smiled in death. 'He was definitely going to heaven' I thought to myself. The smile would charm any angel to open to pearly gates unto him. His hair was still scruffy and I touched it playfully the way I used to when we were younger hoping he would get up and slap me at the back of my head but he didn't.
    My dad offered to call his family but I insisted I be the one to break the news to them. I owed them that much. I did and I told Susan too.
    I got home ,went into the bathroom, turned on the shower as I cried and reminisced on everything that had happened. I should have just left him alone with Susan, maybe they wouldn't get them. Maybe I should have told him about Susan's past myself but I owed Susan that respect.
    After about five minutes, Sade came into the bathroom naked and held me close as the water drenched us. We were there until we heard the twins cry out loud. Sade looked at me and said
    "Hear those cries, he never really left us"
    On hearing that, i went back into the nursery where I heard faint coos. They had stopped crying on getting back to the nursery, we found Susan there playing with the twins. She put her index fingers across her lips signalling us to be silent. She had bloodshot eyes but she still managed to smile at the twins.
    As Sade stepped into the nursery, Susan pulled out a gun and shot Sade in the head,
    "you can't be happy while I'm mourning. Its all your fault Ade. You should have just left us alone. I already told him about the fatwa on my head. He didn't mind. We were supposed to leave for London after our marriage, until your slut of a wife decided to have his babies. I don't know if you knew, but they were sleeping partners before she met you. Its why he did not want you to marry her so I just saved you a future of pain. I knew but I didn't mind, I loved Tola, I still do he was the only man I would never hurt. It was because of him I never took vengeance against Sade.  Take care of the twins, they are mine as much as they are Tola's and yours."
    While she was saying all these, I was on my knees with Sade's head on my laps all bloodied up. She pointed the gun at me but said
    "You don't deserve to die, you were being a good friend. Your intentions were good but they served no purpose"
    In this instant, everything happened in slow motion. I was far away in my mind but I could hear the twins cry but the sounds of their cries were muffled and seemed garbled. The  she put the gun to her temple and shot herself in the head while I watched in horror.
    By Obasa Olatunbosun
    The End.

    Regrets by Obasa Olatunbosun

    By : Beryl

    1
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  • This is our agreement.
    {The first: We've met and we are talking about the supremacy of beauty and grace of the lady we love...
    I am of the opinion my lady is the best... And you are of the same opinion... So now we eulogize our ladies... 
    You speak in one stanza while I speak in the next...  We put in every effort to create the praise greater than the previous stanzas that... This we shall do until the end... Then at the end, you summarize that we are simply men in love...}

    Jodekss:
    Fairy land had to mould this fairy belle in within my reach
    I shall spew of her glowing eyes and colourful lips; shall I not preach
    Her ministry, her aura which compels the mighty men of valour to complain
    To curse their own missuses to win my belle with a refrain?

    Ebi Robert:
    Speak of  her ministry and never Pass to speak of mine
    She is dirty for stanzas, blue black lines, fatty fats and fine fart
    Thou shall screw the perfume, smell this goose and goose this goose
    Till nothing for nostril, shall thy holes dew for her few...

    Jodekss:
    First, she be to me as another nought from the North without worth
    But the very villainy veil cursing the course of this cherub ceased
    Suddenly swiftly slid lost then fervour be outpouring in thought
    As yet my might as a Maharaja cannot grasp her charm so fleeced

    Ebi Robert:
    Oh, to the north be gone her fairness and fare!
    For to the East wind moves my band that brags..
    I bomb and bamboozle every bard that brags
    For she's worth the West and the South miles that bend..
    Beg thee that thine speech don't feast thee,
    For I spare no sec for she ease...

    Jodekss:
    Oh! Shall I not proclaim and profess confessing her pleasing tease?
    With ease she smiles wide blowing the whole wide world apiece
    And even the goodly good cooling cute gazes of white ones weighting in the West office
    She comptrols as my Maharani within beauteous gazes n' touches
    Her skin alone, in their natural self shall I in love send seasons of praises
    And shall I not reiterate with pride the prestigious cheers this cheek encases?

    Ebi Robert:
    Her pleasing tease to proclaim?
    Aye, I, myself, only I sight her pleasing kiss..
    Wet wine that wave my waist to daily soak in winery.
    I blast the winter wind and whitish wings, of stories to be told..
    Of how pure a beauty was,
    of shy was the scary sky-
    Shall the sky not be shy?
    When the earth bear buds bogging this born...
    Burn thee and shy if thou may
    Once scared for this western Kiss is twice skilled for this southern tease...

    Jodekss:
    Sniffing in her passing chariot of pinkish embrace in odour of essence
    Bewitches me and not only that, nay, but also other high borns
    She is low born
    She is no low born
    But high born like the princess the Princes of Persia allot ages waiting for to sense
    And she's being low high born with zillions of stars reeking her passages
    Wanting to cuddle, mingle, commingle… as thee the audience be being been fallen already in her catchy cages
    As she 'tweaks' 'tushed' twisting her shaped behind by rousing chariots as they match pass
    As the farmers plucking their ripe and ripping pretty pawpaw drop to grass
    To follow her cursing elegance as killing as it be as loving she as well pass

    Ebi Robert:
    Nay, thy lady learns
    Mine is charioted by Zues on Olympus and clues
    Mountains top and mountain deep
    beat by beat, speed by speed..
    She seats on golden stool stealing the heavens view..
    Wind by wind, speed by speed
    She sail the clouds, of wisp and flash..
    Tickling lights in cloudy lights..
    For she, the queen returns a visit
    Like she did to Solomon for wisdom view and viewing too
    And Aye, for she measure must plus how men sail her coast to view her too

    Jodekss:
    Tho' Zeu's a myth but of Solomon I encourage through towards then
    Lo behold the commands of her feathery thudding cat-walking and the maze she holds through the den
    Like the Deborah deary, daring the disturbia --the disturbing kings against the centre of the earth
    As she is a lioness who's roar alone even with mane as mighty and bulky bullying as they parade
    Rouse with respect as each piece of hair heard her pride and settle with their cutting grade
    Less she's graded she might degrade and stop to prey and pray for me to feed
    Lest the others alike come comely with their poor pretty's to waggle tales told to jot
    The manager of my heart and the keeper of my mind
    The queen I shall for free lib my oeuvre for from here
    To the space and back I shall the stars know and record well and firm
    In their epoch
    Their once lived a bard boy who fell for one drama Queen to 'em
    And scribes from galaxies and the milky ways shall hold our legacies
    For this one, this very one, this one with luminous eyes is priceless

    Ebi Robert:
    I spark my ways to seven stars, say perfect look my eyes. .
    Thou canst refuse her polished hair weaved with diamond threads..
    For Zues no myth to raise her brow
    For at my imagery I maze her pace
    Little passes these lips of hips
    Without spitting the blaze of her face..
    Spit for fire and brim, while I ash every dinner of doubt..
    Mind no Jupiter for godly taste...
    She makes merry for idol's sake..
    Stay and make her praise..
    I shall grant you and summer holiday...

    Jodekss:
    Come, I am coming to come along with wit with you compeer to compare my Queenie
    With another planet pure pretty witty as the earth be
    Vast in complex simplicity with the morn sky which canst but be
    Cooling like like the cool rock rocking with touches of the breezeing dawn
    Down from the foams walking company up the firmament of of heaven
    Could be culled to be her hairdo she plate just of recent
    As they glimmer and light with lighting effect with grace bellowed by
    As each of her lexicon let out are healing rain drops which feeds souls and impresses my thirsty mo
    As the feet of the earth upon which her feet dances upon as she dramatise
    As she works
    As she walks
    As she stands
    As she jumps
    Gives good glorious manure to the feeds feeding man by making 'em plummet proper on on time

    Ebi Robert:
    I compare not the these hairs that are paired..
    I severe the beau that is clear..
    Comparison comes when two takes to pair
    And severe when two stink to near..
    Thine lady stink to near..
    She lows, she bows and goes..
    When mine beau is told..
    I feel for the Excellency of her smile
    that seals miles away her cheek and beam..
    Burn the iris that is ill when hills keeps her skills..
    For she walks and talks like everything that is won...

    Jodekss:
    Shall I be 'busive in remarks then this panegyrics would these not lose the premier?
    Shall change I the tone to clear the for her the calmly Clyde
    Then shall this praises not be watered with all the elevations wore it afore?
    I shall but not enjoin in the course of cause to curse
    But to park darling dirt together where they are born frosh
    At the breaking of the day when the time's as appealing as the
    Amazement resting in the faces and the doubly gazes of Davinci's drawing
    And shall I not put lahar into effect from the beneath backs of the earth to rise up
    To form funky fine furnaces of fairy flameless fires to mould her face via same
    Shall I not break the dirt pebble, light and gummy in countless companies?
    As the she shores' sands merit and make 'em into gummy and as 'colorful as the statute of liberty with the glowing gold rounded up
    By doubly direless moons, shining sons and jupiters jogging by same
    Whilst the mars with her cooling oven shall always stabilize her diamond bodies
    With her effects... she has merited more than these, o please, she has'.

    Ebi Robert:
    Whilst Mars matches by, I spit clues of what precious visage I cage.
    But will space via void vomit nothing as she walks?
    See, I bear no curse for comparison is but on that Son and Sun spoil no sum.
    For blood bath the son and beam bathe the Sun...
    See, pretty explore the ribbons hung that flesh..
    Reddish spots that spurs the dots form for fought..
    Ho!  Diators that Gla, seal swords and spoil..
    To win but her is something worth..
    Flora-her they done, they gone..
    Her princely curves they done, they gone!

    Jodekss:
    My titular princess and queen of the empire of my mild mind
    This the pride of barbados I have spoken for for real
    The mustard seed as dome and precisely chubby to be still
    Mother of many mother's who princesses and queens in kempt polite with seal.
    I shall immortalise you like marble not like a rusting steal
    Or make you be reeled by millions, billions, zillions of centuries to fall
    In my roles and child and children to be born shall reel this, even
    And marvel with tears of joys rolling down like fountains of glories
    From their eyes filled with fulfilled joys in the heart for these stories from storeys
    And shall wish for your fate and this of love and fervour I share thee
    And shall pay you tribute on daily bases as if she be their breath to be.

    Ebi Robert:
    Doth the Rose not know that she rouse?
    Or that Rome wrote of Little Rose?
    Mask her once forevermore, she but the Force thou forlorn.
    Mask her I swear she is dear-
    The sparkling sparkle sparking the tent
    Where angels hid to sing of her scent
    Vacating heaven for the quest-
    Is she is Red, and white and green?
    For Rose she is and green for clean?
    The Diators must Gla deep and bleed
    And win her heart, so worth a deed...

    Jodekss:
    Tho' I am a or of Caribbean blue but she is in for any blue as it blue, Chelsea blue
    Thus I shall sue
    Sue those which lie up looking at us all in the scalp, the firmament
    The sky, the clouds
    The cumulus and its crossing chiding chores up high
    She is as high as the same and as be as very vital
    Like the salt be very august to the composition of a better soup
    Then to the nimbus with her nearness and nearness always nigh
    As she be at a distant land of Ekiti yet but in yonder and lingering
    I am as close to this diva who's bearing my fate up raising my fame
    Past like the Madiba of the South of us like the stratus straight
    In paces as she plain like the plane, Air force 1 respected as with its chiefly powers
    And polite enigmatic prowess she bears as she cruises the faces of heaven to come down to go up
    Dialysis tho' but she is as pure in the heart like the angel who refused to fall.

    Ebi Robert:
    Aye, complex commerce means this trade..
    Thy lass at last is for worthy prize
    Yet, dicey my lass she sure must last -
    She sings and birds keep still and blast-
    Why voice and us, miss they the tune ?
    Dawn dawn on thee
    On voices resting on  me
    Bless now this queen she conquer my sins..
    Too sweet this queen she suffer my sins...

    Of all, in all, to all, all in all we both big bard bad boys be foolishly insane lovers
    Crazy and would wet ourselves stupidly just to praise and paint in covers
    Lovers
    Lovers who might or might not leave us in spite
    Of our ages and tussles to praise same
    But shame to be not to such game
    As we've in goodness and even refrain even for good the ills of these belles
    Forth and back back and forth for good and not gore
    For adore
    Not shame
    For fame
    For glorious reeling for eyes to be to see and
    Ears seated all ears to hear as the low and richly hand and
    To meet or to count these panegyrics of scansion amount
    Aye, till even time itself run out of tick-tock paces trying to count.

    ©2017

    ‌ ＥＵＬＯＧＹ　ＡＮＤ　ＰＵＦＦＥＲＹ　ＩＩ　by Ebi Robert and Jodekss Gloatkenf

    By : Beryl

    1
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  • [Ayanfe and I had a duet last night ...it's long but fun. Enjoy...]

    Ayanfe
    Beryl
    I Have been to the stream of knowledge to beautify the complete work of the creation but all was bit of iceberg in the pit of your wisdom,in your beauty I want to swim across the ocean and wag my tails in joy of the taste of your lips
    bEryL👑
    These wishes are no less than vain my chosen star
    For this beauty you see is not mine
    The complete work of creation does not lay above me
    Neither does it rest beneath me

    Ayanfe
    Beauty has no visitors
    For the beholder is in charge my pearl,
    Your eyes melt the ice of my heart
    Spare me the reasons why the creation perfected your image into the glowing sun.

    bEryL👑:
    Spear me spare reasons lover man
    This beauty you claim mine I don't see
    True it lies only in your iris
    Yet I see not this you claim mine
    Beryl will spare you reasons this beauty you see is vain
    Yet I won't
    Calm lover man and learn the tricks of the dove in piece yet seen in peace
    This beauty you see is just a side to the pit of hollows

    Ayanfe
    Tell me,of what benefit is it to see love in the eyes of love?
    Of what benefit is it to add water to the ocean?
    Of what benefit is it to put a calabash at tortoise back?
    My love is pure and true,if you are fire,I will become the dancing water to dry your blaze.

    bEryL👑:
    Pardon my arrogance lover man
    You are my chosen star turn in twine lines decades back
    Your love for me is as ancient as the footpaths to righteousness
    Tell me if that is right
    My fire your dancing water never can quench
    Open your ears to the rancorous rhythms afar
    You will see this beauty is only but a fairy
    You are my chosen star yet star crossed
    Our love is crushed with curse

    Ayanfe
    Beryl,let my star crossed shed it's light to your brighten laps that bewildered my olfactory down to my oesophagus for indigestion of understanding,
    Let me cure the curse with love that's so pure and so sure,
    Let my clutches of love that support my heart locate you before an attack.

    Beryl,the rod I bear hold of won't dig well for strangers to fetch,do not be scared my beloved

    bEryL👑:
    Oh beloved fear!
    This word now you crush
    This fear is my greatest wear like you know
    The shadows that held our love cursed
    Tell me oh chosen star if your rod will ever stand to bear the day of reckoning
    Fear!
    I'm still crushed in love curse beloved
    This rod escaped for Juliet when Romeo's words failed
    Of what difference is it now to me

    Chosen star...
    My heart will melt in your furnace if you relent not
    Remember I say
    Our love is crushed with curse

    Ayanfe
    The riches of Arabians will all be yours
    If you join heart in heart and nail curse.

    The Armada of United states will be in your abode
    If you promise to stay.

    The wine of Germany will overflow the tables of our guest on the alter if only you stick like tissues and not glues.

    The beauties of Indian will dance step for your delight and their men will sing songs sang by handsome king that trusted sling of stones in forehead of a giant.

    Lion and its ness will be our guide not in Aso Rock or White House but in a gigantic mansion of the amassed wealth of king Solomon.

    bEryL👑:
    Falsified crew
    Stop!
    Your wealth amaze me not
    My riches lie beneath Mississippi
    And my wealth? Oh not compared with yours
    Bury this glory in your fiery fury
    Not your wealth will I ever melt for
    Even I am a statue of wealth itself
    I am beauty remember not in name but in fame too

    Ayanfe
    Have you forgotten,no beauty without crown.
    No audience without clown.
    Statue of wealth you say,..
    Should I remind you of a minister that coupled wealth of the whole nation but exposed on the run just because she has no crown?

    bEryL👑:
    Chosen star
    Of what difference is a crown
    I have the crown glues to my fore already
    Not of a king lost in nothing but of fame and queen beauty
    I will just stand a square head in thy palace if I follow your path
    I leave no doubt now of our star cross love
    Your rod for sure will not stand on the day of reckoning
    Romeo failed Juliet again you will for me
    Beauty failed Jezebel again it will for me
    Our love will not stand till eternity I say
    Say me affection this crown is lost forever
    But the crown of me stay glued to my fore
    You have just hit nature
    Oh chosen star we are crushed with curse from birth

    Ayanfe
    I will accept defeat of love not because of the curse
    But as a pause
    To rekindle the fire burning low to retire
    Its strength to fear.

    bEryL👑:
    Pardon my arrogance again I say
    Where others fail words will cease the throne
    Your words are lifting to my soul reviving love long lost
    Again I await here on my throne for search of curseless love

    Ayanfe:
    Its Time to wave you well,
    Know for sure my eyes will swell
    Mama long for a bride not the masses ride.
    Papa said I shouldn't be home if I fail to hunt a deer.

    Now am going to a jungle where rope is tied to save people's thought and end their pain and sorrow.

    bEryL👑:
    Well happy hunting chosen star
    Try not to hunt the haunted so it won't come back haunting the hunt

    Ayanfe:
    The hunt hurt while the hunter is hunted,
    Bid me well to chronicles of love and to the passage that love leaves its footprints.

    bEryL👑:
    Let me therefore take your request to the goddess of love
    And let her spray on you her aura of love that lasts eternity

    Ayanfe
    This I say T
                      H
                       A
                         N
                           K
                            S
    Before I depart to lonesome journey.

    bEryL👑:
    In return dream dreamful dreams

    Ayanfe
    Journey of the land doesn't suit dreams of we.

    bEryL👑:
    Who knows if there will be a first feeling of dreams someday till then keep out of fairies

    Ayanfe
    Fairy tales of the moon doesn't keep fallacy
    bEryL👑:
    They better don't.

    By BEryL

    This Loverhood

    By : Beryl

    3
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